ABT Wisdom: January 2006

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Turn Faults into Strengths

Making amends for ﬂawed actions, YES! Making amends for ﬂaws, NO! Feeling guilty in either case, NEVER! Asset-Based Thinking makes you consider your ﬂaws, shortcomings, and limitations as important to whom you are and what you have to work with. You see them as the complement to your talents, strengths, and capabilities.

Monday, January 30, 2006

AbT Interactions :The First Moments

Before you interact, take a moment or two to see something about the person that you ﬁnd valuable, admirable, or interesting. Be speciﬁc. Consciously register your positive perceptions by articulating them to yourself. You might say to yourself, “this person has great energy, or an attractive, strong presence, or a conﬁdent demeanor.”

Thursday, January 26, 2006

ABT examples from a Toddler

Picture the moment when a toddler takes the ﬁrst steps. Imagine their parents’ reactions – their fascination and excitement. Cheering is automatic.Criticism is non-existent, wobbles and mis-steps are not even noticed. In your early years, it’s impossible to learn, grow, or develop a positive sense of yourself without someone letting you know just how amazing and talented you are.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Imitation: Asset Based Thinking Style

The fastest way to learn anything is to imitate a role model. Think about how you learned to walk, speak, write the alphabet and tie your shoes. In the early years, learning by imitation dominates.

Imitating what you admire in others and want to acquire for yourself requires becoming their student, not their judge and jury. As a student of the assets of human nature you are now ready to spot the best of what anyone has to offer.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

The Asset Based Thinking Truth

Use Asset-Based Thinking to give constructive feedback that will have an impact and be heard over the noise of the defense
mechanism. Take all the time you need to formulate your messages. Then, tell the truth fast.

Many people shy away from telling their vision of the truth when it might cause hurt feelings, trigger anger or disrupt the relationship. They hold back the feedback that could potentially help another person change and actually strengthen a friendship because they don’t want the conversation to backﬁre. They let Deﬁcit-Based Thinking take over.

Monday, January 23, 2006

Assess Your Current Situations

At any given moment, in the privacy of your own mind, assess what is working, what is moving forward, what has opened up, and your progress. Make these observations even if there are all consuming front-burner issues that are dominating your attention. Use your mind like a split screen TV – watch how you are handling the immediate issues and note what has facilitated your progress, opportunities that have arisen and how you have leveraged them.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Asset Based Routine Breaker

Daily we must decide to focus on our strengths and what we are capable of doing rather than the daily routine of magnifying flaws and pointing out short-comings. A main source of this is the people we surround our selves with. We can choose to build relationships with people who are interested in progress. Progress, not only for themselves but for others around them. Challenge yourself to concentrate more on what you want to have happen rather than what we dont want to happen. Asset Based Thinking is always ready when you are.

Saturday, January 21, 2006

Asset Based Thinking Analysis and Reflection

Recount the story of your day from a negative, Deﬁcit-Based perspective. Be speciﬁc. (For example, I was late for my ﬁrst appointment. Not only did being stuck in trafﬁc throw off the rhythm of my whole day, being late reminded me of the fact that I am late too often and I must ﬁnd a way to correct that bad habit!) Go ahead, write (or tell someone else) the deﬁcit based version of today’s events – it’s cathartic!

Next recount the story of your day from a positive, Asset-Based perspective. Be sure to describe the same sequence of events. (For example, I was late for my ﬁrst appointment. Being stuck in trafﬁc gave me a chance to start the meeting by cellphone in the taxicab. We were lucky to have a clear connection all the way. Starting the day this way reminded me that being ﬂexible counts and that I am not in charge of trafﬁc patterns.) You will notice a distinct, positive difference in how you are feeling after recalling the ABT version of your day.

Friday, January 20, 2006

Interactions are Key for Asset Based Thinkers

Research conﬁrms that the tone you set (positive or negative) in the ﬁrst 7 seconds of any interaction determines the predominant tone for the remainder of the interaction. Start well and you are more likely to end well – even in the face of challenging or disturbing interactions.

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